Thursday, June 4, 2009

The litmus paper test


Relationships are continuously subjected to tests -- the test of compatibility, the test of strength and durability, the test of time, the test of endurance and other tests that people in relationships so imaginatively come up with.

Everyday, we go about living the relationships either face to face or virtual. We try to make connections. We try to look for points of common interests. We try to dig for compatibilities, similarities in likes and dislikes. SO that we can bring the relationship further to the next level. We constantly look for signs -- signs that we are compatible with a partner or signs that we are not. We experiment under different situations. We look for specific reactions. Sometimes we look for what is not there. And we imagine something is there even without proof of its existence. We test and then we watch out for changes-- changes in the way the partner is behaving in the relationship, changes in the way they treat each other, changes in the usual things they used to do together.Then we make conclusions based on what we see, based on the changes that happened under specific circumstances. SO very like the litmus paper test.

We say that when a couple gets along together so well, there is "chemistry". We cannot blame chemistry then when our relationships are subjected to the litmus paper test. After all, the litmus paper test is a chemical experiment.

Watching videos online about the Hayden-Halili scandal, I "tripped" over a foreign TV program, Cheaters -- Joey Greco anchors. I watched several episodes and saw different results of subjecting relationships to the litmus paper test of fidelity.

Different results. A couple called off a wedding after the girlfriend was proven (and caught in the act) of cheating on the boyfriend. Another couple exchanged ugly words captured right on cam (and shown on national TV --and now youtube too). In most cases the "cheaters" were entrapped, caught in the act and almost always, a fistfight between the "boyfriends" ensues and then the girlfriend and the boyfriend she was cheating with leaves the scene together. The same thing happens with the boyfriend and the woman he was caught cheating with.

In most cases, the relationship falls apart. In other cases, the cheater is forgiven and given a second chance. In some other cases, the tables are turned -- the boyfriend who is trying to entrap the cheating girlfriend ends up being exposed of his own cheating ways.

The litmus paper test of relationships give different results. Different pH levels? Acidic, basic or alkaline? I don't know if it could be held equivalent to the level of trust existing in a relationship. What turns out acidic has little trust in it? What turns out basic has more trust? And what turns out alkaline has so- so trust?

I don't know.
I am just playing with thoughts of relationships and the litmus paper test.

6 comments:

  1. why test?
    why judge?
    why don't we just let things happen?
    why don't we just live each day as it comes?

    ReplyDelete
  2. read thoroughly -- it is not all about the test that you are thinking about.
    I did mention the test of time, the test of compatibility -- u are fond of getting out of the box -- get out now -- look for what the article says -- and not what it is not saying. No judging. Towards the end, I was talking about the cheaters tv program and the results they come up with as they catch cheaters red-handed.

    ReplyDelete
  3. jeanie

    read what i am saying

    you know how i love ignoring the box, or using the post to say what i want, regardless the original

    ReplyDelete
  4. Interesting comparison of litmus test and relationships Jeanie.
    People have seemingly always tried to "test" relationships, some from the beginning to try and determine compatibility others later in the relationship likely to determine or rationalize what is going wrong. Did the partners "ph" change? Can that be changed to more favorable balance; like adding specific chemicals to a pool?
    Perhaps a balanced "pH" in a relationship is a natural result of the chemistry of the relationship. The mixture of trust, appreciation, caring and love in right proportions create the impermeable bonding agent of a relationship.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Let me add my one peso worth of idea.An acid will always turn the litmus paper to a certain color, right? So the nature of what is being tested is crucial to the relationship. No amount of covering will do. They will show their colors. It's just a matter of time.

    ReplyDelete
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